Monthly Curse
Thursday, February 11th, 2010 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
Was part of God’s punishment for Adam and Eve’s original sin cursing the woman to painful monthly menstruations?
Sure Eve tempted Adam with the forbidden fruit but Adam didn’t have to take it. What is man’s punishment? I can’t think of any. Now that I think about it some more… that might explain why men never listen to women. Curse #2.
I write this as I wreath in pain from this monthly curse so pardon the bitterness. The older I get the worse it gets. I’m not the only one – everyone I know experiences excruciating pain at one point every month. At work, it’s no secret when the women are troubled and in a bad mood – I’m no exception. Working women should get a day off every month for their worse day to curl up in bed with their head pad. Co-workers should be spared from the wrath too.
Every month during this viscous cycle I curse at my husband for not impregnating me so I could skip 9 months of this pain. Or is pregnancy pain worse? Anyone?
The other life changing event to end the monthly misery for good is menopause. I can’t wait for the day but then I started hearing from older women that it actually causes more problems of it changing your body for the worse. And you have to start taking hormone replacements. Great!
My doctors suggested I might be in the periomenopausal stage. It freaked me out initially but in my gut I feel they’re wrong. I attribute it to my early work hours which has screwed up my whole system. But I am more determined than ever to rush the baby making.
Curse you Adam & Eve!
Forbidden Husband
Wednesday, January 20th, 2010 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
Oops! My husband finally read my iRate blog post and I’m in trouble.
I usually write my blogs from my iPhone notepad and send it to my private email for review and posting but I sent it to our shared email by mistake and he read it.
He knew I wrote this blog but he never read it and I didn’t want him to since he protested me writing about the whole baby thing. He’s a very private person and never discusses our private life with anyone, not even his friends. So when he read it, he DID NOT LIKE IT ONE BIT. Telling him this blog is anonymous didn’t help.
So I’m forbidden to write about him which is fair — I guess. So I deleted all the blogs about him and promised not to write specific things about him
Am I breaking the rule now by writing this? Probably!
Liar, Liar
Monday, January 11th, 2010 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
Over the holidays, this iRate Chick spent a lot of time with family and I realized how much lying and bribing goes on in rearing children. By the time kids get to be teenagers, it’s no wonder they become good at giving it right back to the adults.
My 4 year-old niece Sabrina is quite a handful and mischievous…much like her mom and myself as kids. Over the course of a day, we must have delivered over a dozen lies and threats in order to get her to behave. We threatened her many times with the old ‘Santa doesn’t bring gifts to naughty children’ which straightened her out.
This is actually the first year that’s worked since she started to comprehend the point of Christmas- gifts. At midnight Christmas night, my sister was still wrapping Sabrina’s gifts in the garage and the little girl was no where near sleepy as she waited for Saint Nick.
I ran into the house pretending excitement about Santa coming. We both ran to hide and she choose my mom’s closet which was next door to the entry way with the Christmas tree. Too close I thought but she wouldn’t budge. Her big beautiful brown eyes lit up and she whispered if I had seen the reindeer. ‘Of course’ I replied and then she wanted to see them. To get her to stay put, I continued the fibbing and said they would disappear if any little kids saw them. She was so disappointed… I felt the guilt setting in. I came up with all sorts of excuses. After what seemed like a lifetime she couldn’t wait any longer and escaped my grip. Thank god they were done with placing the presents under the tree. My sister then took over the little white lies about Santa having to leave quick. She opened her gifts (and everyone else’s) in record time forgetting about Santa in no time.
The guilt about the Santa Claus fib kept bugging me. How is she going to react when she finds out he doesn’t really visit once a year bearing gifts?
I tried to remember when my bubble was burst as a child but I don’t recall when that happened and how I took the news. I do remember my mom telling me that Santa Claus did once exist a long long time ago. I figured she too wouldn’t remember the day she found out the truth.
So now that the Santa excuse is put away like the decorations, we’ll go back to the boogeyman, cucuy, and La Llorona threats to keep my niece in line. Hey, it worked on us and we came out sane. If it works, why mess with tradition.
For now I’ll keep mastering the technique…guilt free — for when I have children.
2010 Prospects
Thursday, December 31st, 2009 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
2009 has come and gone. Last year at this time I was unemployed, worrying about the future and having babies. On this last day of 2009, I sit here contemplating what 2010 holds for us. I’m done making grandiose plans for the new year and will just celebrate the end of the decade.
Thinking back during the last 10 years, life has been great. My family is well, finally married my love of two decades, and have a home I love (except it needs a good cleaning), and my niece Sabrina came into this world in 2006 and made our lives so much richer with her presence. At least if I don’t have kids, she is my adoptive child.
So instead of bitching and complaining about what I don’t have, I will celebrate what I do have. I came to this realization with the news that Sabrina’s paternal grandmother is on her death bed and she might not see it through the new year. She is only in her early 60’s and has been suffering with cancer the last few years but she is a strong woman. Hearing the news put a damper on celebrating the end of 2009, but it also made me realize you have to live every day like it’s your last because it might end soon. I feel even worse for her son, Sabrina’s father who cherishes his mother. It’s a sad, sad day for their families and my niece who will not get to see her grandmother anymore. Hopefully, she won’t forget her since she is young.
But I shouldn’t talk about her in the past as she is still fighting to stay here on Earth and fought to stay another day as I write this. My thoughts and prayers are with her and my only wish for the new year is that she makes it through.
Depression Hurts
Wednesday, November 25th, 2009 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
Since turning 40, I haven’t been able to shake the blues. Two friends with similar baby wants turned 40 in the summer and they suffered with depression after their birthdays but being the optimist, I told them to look on the bright side. Things will work out. Then a few weeks after my birthday, I felt down too.
At first I thought it was the usual depression I feel in the fall around the time change. Since I was a kid, I always felt that way because summer was over and it was back to school. So I wrote it off as the usual, but come November I was nearly in tears a couple of times and going off on my husband a lot…more than he’s used to. My patience level is at an all time low so I blow up at everybody.
I attributed it to getting up at 1:45 am to get to work and then coming home and working some more on my side projects until I went to bed ‘What is wrong with you,’ my conscious kept telling me as I tried to talk myself out of it. Here we are approaching the last month of 2009 and still feeling the same but I have a better handle of it now.
I keep thinking of the television commercial for Cymbalta, ‘Depression Hurts’ and so it does but as I preached to my friends, look on the bright side…and that’s how I’m holding up.
Third Boob Confirmed
Saturday, October 10th, 2009 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
All this time I was kidding with my husband that the annoyingly large lump of fat under my arm was an extra boob….and it turns out to be true.
As a good 40 year old woman, I went in for a mammogram after my birthday and they did their usual squishing your boobs in between two cold slabs of metal tests but I asked them to check the lump which keeps getting larger with the weight gain just to be sure it wasn’t something harmful.
Since hitting puberty, the underarm lump with a dimple right smack in the middle of it has prevented me from wearing strapless clothes because of my problem with it. While I see it peaking out of most women’s strapless wear and doctor’s have told me it’s normal fatty tissue, I can’t get over it and won’t wear anything revealing. Although I did wear a strapless wedding dress, the ugly fatty head made its way into the photo album. Oh, well! That was my only exception for the special day. Bathing suits are another matter. I had one bathing suit which I loved because I could tuck the sucker in but it no longer fits me and I have not been able to find a similar one to do the job. But it’s not like I’ll be going to the beach or a pool anytime soon since I dislocated my shoulder in a Las Vegas pool for my birthday in 2007. I have a fear of pools now and beach is not happening either…well maybe if it’s on a tropical vacation.
So when I met my husband and he finally saw my naked body, he asked why the lump was there with a dimple. I referred to the Arnold Schwarzenegger movie “Total Recall” in which one of the mutants on Mars had three breasts. I teased him that I was a mutant with a third bosom and he laughed but I told him it was a natural lump according to the doctors who examined it.
At 40, that lump is the most annoying thing on my body while I’m PMS’ing. It’s sore, raw, and grows during that horrible period (cue the drum crash) so I complained about it to my current doctor who suggested I ask the Mammogram technicians to check during my appointment. So after the mammogram, the ultrasound lady tech checked and confirmed that there is breast tissue in the lump which explains the soreness and sensitivity during your menstrual cycle. I wondered if a plastic surgeon could suck the fat out of the thing but the lady tech replied that people have had more problems with the removal of it than just keeping it. Not that I would ever spend money on that, but the thought has crossed my mind.
But wouldn’t most men find a third bosom a turn on? More to play with? My husband didn’t buy that argument but he accepts me third boob and all.
Mammogram Age
Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
Around your birthday you get junk mail wishing you a happy birthday from creditors and the Hallmark club for example.
A week after my birthday I received a sort of birthday wish – a reminder that I’m at that age required for an annual mammogram.
Great! One more thing to add to my “Over 40 Worries”
Guess I better get on it and make that appointment.
I’m 40
Saturday, September 12th, 2009 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
So I made it through the dreaded 40th birthday on 09-09-09. Cool date, shitty age.
I started my day early, opting to go work that day as usual at 3 am but by 2pm we were at Disneyland enjoying my free day pass courtesy of Mickey Mouse.
A day after turning 40 – I came to two conclusions; start lying about my age (nice to meet you, I’m 35 years-old) and it’s time to try for children. I don’t know why I feel a sense of urgency to get pregnant now. Before I felt like I had time but now the race is on and relayed that to my sperm donor.
The race is on….
20 Years Together
Wednesday, August 19th, 2009 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
Yesterday my husband and I celebrated 20 years together, five of those married. We kept it low key with an early dinner at the Redondo Beach pier, a walk at sunset and some arcade games where I kicked some Centipede butt. I still got it after all these years. Wasn’t so lucky at Galaga though.
My other half wanted to go to the place where we met and take a picture but I thought it was too far and I had to be in bed early for work. But it was a good idea because the goth club in Hollywood where we met is now a Home Depot. That was the site of some good times not just meeting my husband but hanging out with friends during our gothic phase. We stil try to go clubbing at least once a year to a different location in Hollywood – same music, same people – different attitude. It’s funny that the fashion hasn’t changed and a new crop of goths take on the same look and the music is still better then the crap out today.
We were so carefree and had all the energy of a teen but with our responsibilities and age, we don’t enjoy it the same and tire easily. Plus we don’t drink like we used to either which is not such a bad thing. At least we have some good memories from those days.
And as I think of our time together, it doesn’t feel like 20 years. We’ve had some really good times and some rocky moments but I know we still love each other the same and still want to hang out together (although I do need some ‘me time’ once a week).
I joked with him that we could have a twenty-year old kid by now and he cringed. We would totally be two different people by now if we had a child within that time – hell we might not even be together. He regrets not having kids sooner but he still feels we’re not financially ready. He’s a walking contradiction. Regardless. We have to get started soon.
But I always feel things work out for a reason and I’m happy we’re still together after all these years as I reach 40 next month. Argh!!!!
Hairy Situation
Friday, August 14th, 2009 | iRate Chick blogs | No Comments
My hair is very excited today. After ignoring my hair for over a year, it’s finally getting the pampering it’s longed for.
Not only is it Friday, but I’m having my hair trimmed and covering up the gray that’s populated my scalp since my last half-ass self-dye job 4 weeks ago.
My hair is so long and straggly, I keep thinking there’s a spider on my arm where the strand of hair pricks.
So this is a good way to start the weekend – all I need now is more sleep.
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